Back to 1987

Having not heard any clear direction from the Lord beyond that initial word, we settled in the only place we could--my father and mother-in-law's house in Mission Hills, at the northern end of the San Fernando Valley. In looking for a church, it seemed best to us to attend one we had not been to before where perhaps our ministry gifts would be useful. After a few false starts, we settled in at the Panorama City Foursquare Church being welcomed by the pastor and his wife. Jim and Jane Phillipi were acquaintances more than friends when we arrived, however, Jane grew up in Santa Maria, for whatever that is worth. We attended the church and found some ministry things to do from October 1987 until February 1988. During that time we twice had visiting ministers call us out of the congregation to tell us they saw the hand of God on our lives and ministries.

We were standing, worshipping during a Sunday morning church service in February 1988 when as clearly as I had ever heard the voice of the Lord to that time, I heard Him say, "You don't need to be here. You need to be in Santa Maria." That week I explained the situation to Jim. He was completely understanding and agreed we did not have any choice but to go. The following Sunday morning we were in the worship service at the Santa Maria Foursquare Church. A new pastor had taken over the leadership of that church since we had last visited. The only thing I can tell you about that first service is that my spirit witnessed that we were in the right place for the first time in awhile. It is one of the very few times I have wept during a worship service.

We commuted from the San Fernando Valley to Santa Maria on weekends, sometimes all six of us, sometimes only one or two, for about six months until we were able to get out of the lease on the house we had rented. It was at about the same time our lease ended, we were in a Sunday evening service in Santa Maria when we met a couple who were in the real estate business. We inquired as to whether they knew of any houses we might be able to move into on a lease option basis. They did. We moved to Santa Maria in September 1988. At that point, I began doing a reverse commute--working in the San Fernando Valley during the week and coming home to Santa Maria on the weekends. It was during that commute we were assigned the task of rebuilding the college and career ministry which had fallen into some neglect after the departure of the previous leaders from the church.

The college and career ministry became fruitful once again. We taught a Sunday School class and had a small group meeting in our home which we named "Monday night manna" after the small group meeting we had started in Davis. (For those of you unfamiliar with the term, manna is the food that fell from heaven which the Israelites ate during their wanderings in the wilderness. The word manna means "what is it?") We never knew what was going to happen when that group got together and began to worship and pray. We saw physical and emotional healings as they simply believed God to do what they asked of him. By that time I had managed to find a full time job in Santa Maria selling life insurance and investment products.

The Lord also began to speak words of edification, exhortation, and comfort to me for the church. He told me I was to be a watchman on the wall, to warn of approaching danger. At that point my mind was still intent on being a pastoral staff member. I looked to the pastor to give me a position of ministry not realizing God already had. I wanted to get paid, to make my living in the ministry. Sometime during this period of time, my mother-in-law conveyed a message to me she had received from the Lord. She said the devil was setting a snare for my soul. I cannot explain why, but it never occurred to me to follow-up on the word to see if I could ascertain exactly what it meant for me. As of this writing I realize the snare she mentioned was the fear of man. (Proverbs 29:25) It became an ongoing problem which only recently have I confessed and repented from. Neither that pastor nor any other pastor--nor any other man, can put me into the ministry. But God is faithful, by whom I was called into the fellowship of His Son, Jesus Christ our Lord. (1 Corinthians 1:9) He alone is able to put me into the ministry.

One morning I was sitting in the church worship service, near the front as is my custom. For some reason there were no other people near me. I will not claim to have heard the audible voice of God, but the words came so clearly that I looked around to see who could have said them. Such a one has a controlling spirit. I recognized that person as one of the pastoral staff members. That very day I went and told the pastor what I had heard. He dismissed what I said as unbelievable to him. Two weeks later he called us into a side room off the platform and said that he had been wrong. He had asked the staff member if what I said were true. She said it was and asked him to pray for her that it might be taken away.

Within the next several weeks, I was awake in the early morning hours being compelled to write down another word from the Lord for the church. In short, the word was that there was a problem in the church which, if not dealt with, would cause damage to the church and to many people in the church. That word was summarily dismissed and it seems to me, may have become the beginning of the end for us in that church. Shortly thereafter, the pastor accused me of unChristian conduct. He called his church council together, but refused to hear any defense and did not even present me with any specific charges. All he wanted to know is if I were willing to confess and repent. When I told him I would not consider doing that until I knew what the charges were, he told me there was nothing else to discuss and ordered me to leave the church. I did find out what the charges were nearly five years later when I reached out to restore fellowship with this pastor. At that time, one of the things he apologized for was that he had neglected to make me aware of the charges at that meeting five hears prior. Thankfully, his secretary had taken meticulous notes that showed him the charges had been discussed before I had joined the meeting.

We both knew his order to leave the church was unenforceable and possibly even illegal, but with four young children who would be affected by any struggles or stresses that might arise by our staying, discretion seemed the better part of valor. We left in search of a different church fellowship. The unfortunate end of that story is that within the following six months many people did leave the church. Although the specific reasons for that are still unclear, the pastor estimated that 250 people left the church during that time. We heard one estimate that put the total number at around 535. We know people from that exodus who have never returned to church. As for us, we were totally knocked off balance and did not recognize what had happened as a spiritual counterattack against the good work with the college and career group. As if being told to leave the church were not enough, shortly thereafter, the devil would begin pulling out all the stops in an effort to neutralize us and keep us from entering into the spiritual warfare which we have only recently discerned as possibly the very reason God sent us back to this valley in 1987.